Life is not a dress rehearsal!!

Posts tagged anxiety rx

Time Anxiety

Time Anxiety

A week ago my doctor gave me a prescription for Xanax after I went on a rant in his office about my current state of frustration. Over the past few weeks, I’ve become increasingly possessive of my time and the lack of common courtesy with people and organizations who do not reciprocate this courtesy.

My doctors appointment became the boiling point because I was not seen until almost an hour past my appointment time. And this, among several other inconveniences, cut into the precious time I had before Gabby went off to college, including our planned mani/pedi’s the day before she left.

It’s not as if we have full on conversations, but I just wanted to be in her presence. Like holding a baby’s hand or smelling a baby’s blanket, once that time is past, you only have the memory.  

While I know I’ll probably vent in the near future on the serial incompetencies that waste of my time (and I’m sure yours too) right now I want to focus on the time I can control. I wanted to freeze time in the days before my baby moved on-campus.

Before she left, I tried with all of my being and all my might, to live in the present.  I’ve cried a few times over the past few days.  The Xanax prescription is still in my handbag. I think instead of a pill or a drink, I just need some time.